Human interactions including dating relationships are made up and sustained by negotiations. To be able to succeed in any negotiation we must be able to understand the language that the other party speaks. In romantic relationships our dating partner expresses his or her feelings through love languages. That language could be affirming words touch gift-giving acts of service or giving quality time. It is up to us to understand what love language our date use and to act accordingly in order for the relationship to succeed.
I’ve been getting a lot of emails lately from men who are using Craigslist. It seems that more than anyplace else most of the women who post ads there are not women at all but ads for different spammer companies. Interestingly though I’ve also been getting some emails from women who are using craigslist. They want to know why guys don’t believe they’re real. When both genders are having these problems on the same dating site it’s a recipe for disaster. To help out the guys I’ve written up some tips to help them navigate the jungle of Craigslist in hoped of turning an online dating ad into real life romance.
Who’s Real and Who’s Fake?
OK let’s face it if you’re looking at this post its because you’ve written to some women here and not gotten a response. Was it something you said? Were they even real women in the first place or were they just a spammer scammer or Russian bride in search of a green card?
I’ll be honest with you. There are a lot of fake profiles out there on this site. There are also some real ones. How do you tell? Well there’s a couple of tricks you can use to figure it out.
- Look at the location. Some fake profiles have Orlando listed but most just have it blank If a woman on here is local she will always put in a city in the location section to avoid getting responses from guys all over the place.
- Use the Mouse! When you are looking at a profile take your mouse and click at the top of the profile text. Now drag your mouse all the way down to the location and posting ID. If you see invisible text starting to appear as you highlight the profile it’s a fake.
- To photo or not to photo? There’s a big brouhaha over photos or no photos on CL. Some guys think that any woman not putting up a photo on here is fake. I can tell you that is not true. Because this site does have a bit of a reputation… a lot of women would prefer to reveal themselves only to people who interest them. So I’ll be honest with you… No photo is definitely a yellow flag but it’s not a red flag. So don’t go knocking people off just because you can’t see their face. But also keep in mind that here is still a decent chance that they are not real.
- links: Ok… this one is simple… If they are directing you to a website where they have “photos” they are fake. Get over it and move on.
Craig’s list is a community so you’ve got to have each other’s back here. What does that mean? Very simple. If you see a posting here that sounds hinky or that shows the warning signs that I’ve listed click the little spam button in the upper right-hand corner. This helps clean out all the garbage.
Finding the real women but still can’t get a response?
A lot of that can be the way you respond to ads or the ad you are placing.
How you present yourself is important. When you are writing an ad the goal is to give people just enough info to make them want to know more. Think of this as your trailer. Don’t show your baggage. Stay Positive. Also Don’t try to be funny. If you’ve got something funny to say it will come through but when you try to be funny it just sounds like you are trying to be funny.
Also when you put up an ad if you include photos make sure you are fully clothed. That means no shirtless pics. It doesn’t matter how ripped you are women laugh at these photos. Even more important… NO photos of any part of your body that you’d get aressted for showing on the street!
When you are writing to someone who has posted an ad keep it simple. Just give them the info that they are asking for. If they ask for a photo give them one (see above for rules). Also don’t question if they are real and don’t try to sell yourself just be yourself and if they are interested they will respond.
Hopefully this will help you all succeed on Craigslist but if you want private coaching or helping making a great dating ad just contact me. I’ve helped over 5000 people improve their online dating lives and find love through the internet. Just check out ProfileHelper.com. Or give me a call at 888-44-profile.
Eric
Friends:
Natasha
Klavdia
Marina
